top of page

Ask for Exactly What You Want- it’s not Selfish

In a world where communication is key, the ability to articulate our desires is VERY important!  But, for some reason, we shy away from stating our needs explicitly, not wanting to come across as “high maintenance”.   This leaves room for misinterpretation and usually disappointment.

It's time to embrace the importance of asking for EXACTLY what we want, without fear of being labeled selfish or self- serving.  When we fail to articulate our desires clearly, we leave it up to others to interpret what we may want. However, what someone else imagines our needs to be may not align with our true desires. This can lead to frustration, misunderstandings, and missed opportunities. By expressing our wants explicitly, we eliminate ambiguity and ensure that our needs are understood accurately.

Moreover, being specific about our wants is not selfish; it's self-care. It's about honoring our own needs and advocating for ourselves. By clearly stating what we want, we empower ourselves to create the life we desire. Additionally, when we are upfront about our desires, we give others the opportunity to fulfill them and strengthen our relationships through open and honest communication.

If you have ever been to dinner with me- you know that I ask for a water with 5 limes.  FIVE.  Why?   Because if I ask for a water with lime or even “some limes” I’ll get one or 2- shriveled up or juiceless limes jammed onto the top of my glass.   EPIC FAIL.  When I specifically state that I’d like 5 limes- I usually get nice big slices of lime (sometimes a fresh lime specially cut just for me) on a small plate.  This will usually get me all the way through dinner without having to ask for more lime when my water glass gets refilled.  I KNOW this seems excessive but- for years I was constantly  disappointed to only receive one or two sad little limes with my water- so I started asking for what it is that I really want.  FIVE LIMES.  It’s become kind of a joke to some- and I’ll laugh off the awkwardness- but, a girl wants what she wants dammit!

Asking for exactly what we want puts us in control of our own happiness and success, rather than relying on others to guess what we need, we take ownership of our desires and actively work towards fulfilling them.  Being specific with your wants is essential for effective communication, self-care, and personal growth. It's not about being selfish; it's about advocating for ourselves and creating the life we envision. So, let's embrace the power of CLEAR and DIRECT communication, and never leave our desires up to someone else's interpretation.

Ask for the limes!  🍈🍈🍈🍈🍈

With love from my core,


30 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


For a few years in the mid to late 70’s we attended a church close to where I was growing up. I don’t remember much about that church except my uncle got married there and I was supposed to be the f


bottom of page